This post has been updated in February of 2022 to reflect our newest subscriptions. It was originally published in March of 2020
You love Blazing Saddles. You want to be embalmed in it*. It's your favorite. You've actually named your first child "Blazing" and your second child "Saddles."
You're a hardworking dude. You stand in a sweaty subway for 45 minutes every day with 500 other people. You like to shower when you get up, but by the time you get home, you need another shower. So many smelly, smelly people.
You're also hairy. Because you're manly. And because of that, you go through a lot of Outlaw handmade soap. Your hair just sucks it right up. But it's worth it, because, like you just said, you want to be embalmed in the scent.
The thing is, since Outlaw increased the price of your handmade soap, it's, like, $30/mo in soap. Plus shipping. So, like $45. And that's ok, because it's Blazing-Saddles-or-Bust, but still, Blazing and Saddles (your children, remember?) have been asking you for skateboards, and your Blazing Saddles (your soap, naturally) habit has been chipping away at their skateboard fund.
And you want to try the solid cologne and automobile air fresheners because, as we have already established, you effin' LOVE Blazing Saddles, and you HATE the smelly people on public transportation. People say they're both great, but you're already spending $45/mo on soap. So you keep riding public transportation and smelling like laundry detergent. It's ok. It's not great.
When Outlaw launched their natural lotion, you were like, "HOLY SH!T, THIS IS THE GREATEST!" and you got some. And it's everything you wished for... even though you're not much of a lotion guy, this is some OUTSTANDING lotion.
Like, you were going through a bar a week of handmade soap, and now you can extend that scent all day long, and smooth your tumbleweed hands. 100% winning. And ... holy sh!t.
Outlaw offers a subscription box that includes the lotion and it's 25% off?
Well, you're not a lotion guy, but since all this is Blazing Saddles Lotion, you're rethinking that whole "not a lotion guy" thing.
"What's that?" your wife asks as you walk through the door at the end of a long and particularly laborious day.
"What's what?" you ask, wondering if the person sharpieing the seat you were sitting on accidentally got some on your shirt. You know. Kids these days and whatnot.
"You smell great!"
Hey! This lotion stuff works!
"And your hands are so soft!"
Blazing and Saddles come charging through the door. "HEY MOM! HEY DAD!"
They just came back from the skate park. You bought them skateboards and helmets (of course) with all the money you saved when you made your own Blazing Saddles Subscription Box.
You've won Dad of the Year award AND Husband of the Year award in just one wise subscription box purchase!
THAT'S RIGHT... THIS COULD BE YOUR STORY if you build your own subscription box!
* Actual customer request.