| by Danielle Vincent

The New Clean Getaway: A Blazing Saddles Story

You love Blazing Saddles. You want to be embalmed in it*. It's your favorite. You've actually named your first child "Blazing" and your second child "Saddles."

You're a hardworking dude. You stand in a sweaty subway for 45 minutes every day with 500 other people. You like to shower when you get up, but by the time you get home, you need another shower. So many smelly, smelly people.

You're also hairy. Because you're manly. And because of that, you go through a lot of Outlaw handmade soap. Your hair just sucks it right up. But it's worth it, because, like you just said, you want to be embalmed in the scent.

The thing is, since Outlaw increased the price of your handmade soap, it's, like, $40/mo in soap. Plus shipping. So, like $55. And that's ok, because it's Blazing-Saddles-or-Bust, but still, Blazing and Saddles (your children, remember?) have been asking you for skateboards, and your Blazing Saddles (your soap, naturally) habit has been chipping away at their skateboard fund.

And you want to try deodorant because, as we have already established, you effin' LOVE Blazing Saddles, and you HATE the smelly people on public transportation. People say it's great, but you're already spending $55/mo on soap. So you keep using some other deodorant. It's ok. It's not great.

But you've really wished you could get that Blazing Saddles deodorant.

When Outlaw launched milled soap, you were like, "HOLY SH!T, THIS IS THE GREATEST!" and you got some. And it's everything you wished for... AND it lasts longer... TONS longer.

Like, you were going through a bar a week of handmade soap, and now you're going through maybe a bar every month. It's solid. And now you can afford the deodorant.... and ... holy sh!t. They're going to offer a subscription box that includes the lotion? Well, you're not a lotion guy, but you'll give it a try.

"What's that?" your wife asks as you walk through the door at the end of a long and particularly laborious day.

"What's what?" you ask, wondering if the person sharpieing the seat you were sitting on accidentally got some on your shirt. You know. Kids these days and whatnot.

"You smell great!"

Hey! This deodorant stuff works!

"And your hands are so soft!"

Heeeey now.

Blazing and Saddles come charging through the door. "HEY MOM! HEY DAD!"

They just came back from the skate park. You bought them skateboards and helmets (of course) with all the money you saved from the Blazing Saddles Clean Getaway Box.

You've won Dad of the Year award AND Husband of the Year award in just one wise subscription box purchase!

THAT'S RIGHT... THIS COULD BE YOUR STORY if you subscribe to the soon-to-come New Clean Getaway Subscription Box!

Watch this space for news of the upcoming amazingness.

* Actual customer request.

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