In lieu of another review for my recent order, I decided to write a short story based in the world of my book series. I like the product that much. I hope you guys don't mind but DO enjoy. Thanks.
SMELL LIKE AN OUTLAW
Big Fats Washington entered the small shop with some wonder and slight hesitation. He had fought many men and left most dead in the dust. Fats had seen great horrors and the worst experiences the world had to offer. So why was he so on edge entering this four-walled temple of commerce?
The bright, shiny, newly formed sign sat atop the wooden building and read, "OUTLAW SOAPS & MORE!"
Despite being an outlaw, Washington was always one to maintain himself. He washed regularly, fitting a potential pun in his own name. Always keeping himself clean and presentable, Big Fats stopped short of fragrances. He did not wear cologne. He did not like to smell like anything. He just didn't want to smell.
When men walked by smothered in the stuff, Fats would choke and cough himself a fool and his gag reflex would go wild. He couldn't stand it. The men's scents were stomach-churning and the women's were too sweet and seemed to be attempting to cover up of something else, but it only mixed with it and produced something even more foul.
The shopkeepers were a married couple. They looked nice enough and upon introduction it was discovered that they were even nicer. Big Fats explained his hesitation and the owners nodded having been through this a lot since they opened.
Showing Washington around they let his nose sample their many different scents and products. Soap, bodywash, deodorant, cologne and more lined their shelves. The scents were all different and unique. The smells of whiskey, campfire, gunpowder and many others some might call "manly" filled his nostrils. They weren't too strong either. He could wear these products without overbearing his or other people's senses.
Finally something made for him.
Washington bought a little of everything in the scent "FIRE IN THE HOLE," which was one their bestsellers. He stowed the products away on the war bags resting upon his horse Encore.
Bidding the shopkeeps a thank you for this revelation of smell and cleanliness and a farewell that sounded a lot like "see you again soon," Big Fats Washington rode off into the sunset, smelling like an outlaw should.
From now on when his enemies looked down the barrel of his pistol and into his eyes, before they bit the dust they would say, "What's that delightful smell?"
Right before he introduced them to their maker he would answer, "Fire in the Hole."
David C. Mollé
July 25th 2020
Outlaw Soap and Fire in the Hole
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